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Prom

31 May

window-dressing-janet-webbPhoto copyright Janet Webb

“Where d’ya think yer goin’, dressed like dat?” Daddy slurred from his chair, slinging back another finger of Jack. “You turnin’ inta a tramp, just like yer mama.”

Daddy’s been in the bottom of a bottle since Mama defected from the family three years ago. Every ounce of kindness in him has been pickled. But the familiar accusation stings more than usual tonight. I’d actually hoped he might smile like he used to and call me his little princess.

“It’s prom night, Daddy. We talked about this, remember? Right now, most fathers are telling their daughters how beautiful they look.”

Exactly 100 words for this week’s installment of Friday Fictioneers, the place where anyone is welcome to link up with his or her own little story spun from the photo prompt offered by Rochelle Wisoff-Fields.

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Posts I commented on today:
Tea–a haiku with photo (This, That and the Other Thing)
Who Does the Dress Belong To? (Short Stories and Random Thoughts)  new blog of the day
Day 27, Monday: A Letter To My Readers (The Sock Zone)  another new blog

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18 Comments

Posted by on May 31, 2013 in Challenges, Fiction

 

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18 responses to “Prom

  1. Helena Hann-Basquiat

    May 31, 2013 at 7:21 PM

    That last line is heartbreaking, darling. Well written.

     
  2. MissTiffany

    May 31, 2013 at 7:24 PM

    This tugs at the heartstrings! Well done.

     
  3. Sarah Ann

    May 31, 2013 at 7:36 PM

    Very touching. You can feel her sadness at being let down, but her strength in that last sentence as she tells him how it should be. Love the idea of his pickled kindness.

     
  4. Silvia Writes

    May 31, 2013 at 7:40 PM

    I agree with Helena … last line is heartbreaking. This promises to be a good story. You paint an emotional picture for the reader from the very beginning.

    (Visiting from A-Z Blogging Challenge, and it’s nice to be here)
    Silvia @ Silvia Writes

     
  5. John Hardy Bell

    May 31, 2013 at 8:25 PM

    Lots of emotion packed into 100 words. Well done!

     
  6. lingeringvisions

    May 31, 2013 at 9:56 PM

    This brought tears to my eyes.

     
  7. Endless Edits

    June 1, 2013 at 12:18 AM

    “Every ounce of kindness in him has been pickled.” this is a great line.

     
  8. lindarigsbee

    June 1, 2013 at 2:39 AM

    Poor girl. I’m so glad I had great parents!

     
  9. Sandra

    June 1, 2013 at 6:36 AM

    Really sad. Some catchy descriptions here. Very effective.

     
  10. petrujviljoen

    June 1, 2013 at 7:40 AM

    Well written. Touching.

     
  11. Janet domino

    June 1, 2013 at 10:40 AM

    As usual I want to hear the rest of the story!

     
  12. The Writers Village

    June 1, 2013 at 3:14 PM

    Poor thing.
    ACOA – Adult Children of Alcoholics is available or Al-Anon for families.
    In the meanwhile, go enjoy the prom as best you can.
    Good, tight work. Randy

     
  13. Björn Rudberg (brudberg)

    June 1, 2013 at 4:11 PM

    Very sad… but drinking never solves anything…

     
  14. Lily Mugford

    June 1, 2013 at 8:07 PM

    Sad little story and sadly true.

     
  15. neenslewy

    June 1, 2013 at 9:15 PM

    A sad tale – well told.

     
  16. Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

    June 1, 2013 at 9:47 PM

    Dear Michelle,

    I felt the daughter’s sadness, anger and loneliness. Wonderful characterizations.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

     
  17. 40again

    June 2, 2013 at 9:45 AM

    What a sad story, I feel for the girl, her sadness and hope.
    The last line was brilliant, well done
    Dee

     
  18. Joe Owens

    June 4, 2013 at 5:31 PM

    Our kids want to know we are proud of them and think they are beautiful. it is not hard to do, we just have to keep it in mind.

     

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