10 May

icon-grill-ted-strutzPhoto copyright Ted Strutz

“What flavor’s your despair tonight, Lace?” Hal asked, slipping a newly-dried glass into the overhead rack. “Cosmo? Heineken? Merlot?”

“Shirley Temple.”

Laughter exploded behind the bar. “Shirley Temple?! You yankin’ my chain? Really, what’ll ya have?”

“I told you. Shirley Temple. Lots of ice.“

“You on the wagon, or somethin’? What gives?”

“It’s for the kid.”

“What kid?” Hal peered suspiciously over the bar and warned, “You know I don’t let no kids in here.”

Suddenly his eyes shot to Lacey’s lap. Stunned, he could barely croak, “You shittin’ me?”

“I told you you shouldn’ta drove me home that night.”

Once again I’ve joined the Friday Fictioneers in a humble attempt to tell a whole story in just 100 words. The action and emotion of these stories are always clear in my mind (should be, since I know everything that wasn’t said), but I’d welcome feedback on anything that I’ve missed which makes the story unclear.


Posts I commented on today:
West Seattle Murals (Where’s my backpack?)
Quiet in the Corner (Two Shoes in Texas)  new blog of the day
Besting your Best (The Better Man Project)


Posted by on May 10, 2013 in Challenges, Fiction



13 responses to “Cocktails

  1. Kwadwo

    May 10, 2013 at 8:03 PM

    An item from the list of crazy things alcohol can do to a person.

  2. EagleAye

    May 10, 2013 at 8:30 PM

    Hilarious! There sometimes consequences for a binge too many. A very clever ending.

  3. Christopher Schuck

    May 10, 2013 at 10:22 PM

    Haha, very clever and delightful story. I had to read it a second time to make sure. Lacey and Hal are having a baby! Raise your glasses boys!

  4. newpillowbook

    May 10, 2013 at 10:52 PM

    Well, that’s one way to break the news! 🙂

  5. sustainabilitea

    May 11, 2013 at 12:26 AM

    That’s a big “whoops!” I really like your opening line.


  6. rochellewisoff

    May 11, 2013 at 10:48 AM

    Now there’s a unique take on the prompt. Whoops is right and she chose a clever way to inform him. Well done!

  7. buffalostarmedicine

    May 11, 2013 at 1:06 PM

    Good one! Love the way she tells him…poetic justice indeed.

  8. Josie Two Shoes

    May 11, 2013 at 5:23 PM

    A delightful piece! Working with 100 words isn’t easy, and you’ve captured not only the story line but a bit of the characters’ personalities in this too. I totally enjoyed it! Thanks for stopping by my blog, I see you’ve awarded me new blog of the day… I so appreciate that! I’ll be back to read more here. 🙂

    • dreaminofobx

      May 15, 2013 at 7:46 PM

      I missed so many blogs during the A to Z challenge that I committed to reading and commenting on three posts each day in May, and at least one of those had to be on a blog that was completely new to me (a great way to visit more A to Zers). I’m finding some excellent writers and photographers as a result!

  9. lingeringvisions

    May 12, 2013 at 2:59 AM

    This is funny only if it happens to someone else.

  10. Sarah Ann

    May 12, 2013 at 6:52 PM

    Really like this. That opening line, ‘What flavor’s your despair tonight,..’ is wonderful. Not sure he’ll make a great dad.

    • dreaminofobx

      May 15, 2013 at 7:34 PM

      Not sure she’s gonna be the best mom, either, but at least she opted for the Shirley Temple…that’s gotta be a good sign!

  11. Lily Mugford

    May 13, 2013 at 12:55 AM

    Beautiful ending… what a way to tell him… love it.


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